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What to do when you hurt your own feelings

Overthinking is a hazard when you are trying to maintain good emotional health. You know the kind, the thoughts that try to predict the future or maybe rewrite the past. The thoughts that will figure out that thing that has been annoying you for years and that you have thought about 100 times, but maybe this once more….

If you drop down out of those thoughts, you’d find that it’s making your body feel terrible. Tension, stomach pains, shallow breathing…I won’t even get into the forehead wrinkles. To our bodies there is little difference between something that’s actually happening and what we are thinking about, it is getting ready to fight, to shut down or to flee. Our thoughts put us in a stress response.

So here are three things to help yourself shift out of that energy and quiet down the wild thoughts bouncing around your head:

  1. Stop and drop into your body. Notice where there is tension, or tightness and give yourself some deep breaths, inhale and then exhale as far as you can.

  2. Place a hand on the part of your body manifesting the discomfort, ex. your heart, neck, stomach and acknowledge that you are feeling like you have to figure this out, and maybe you don’t have to.

  3. DOOOOOO something. Shifting out of this means action, get outside if your inside, put on some music and dance, take a nice refreshing cold shower. Give your body a different experience.

Taking care of these feelings without beating yourself up is key. You’re trying to change things and that is hard. Be as patient and nonjudgmental as you can. This is where you are right now, it will get easier.


Tina Landeen

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